What Bangs Gave Me


1). The ability to not give a fuck.

2). More excuses to wear headbands.

3). The appearance of someone who does not give a fuck.

4). The ability to trick my mind into thinking people are looking at me because they think I am a celebrity.

5). The opportunity to carry around a fine tooth comb and use it in public.

6). The self-confidence of Kourtney Kardashian.

7). The desire to go up to people and ask which celebrity I look most like.

8). The ability to look like a long lost member of The Ramones and/or Justin Beiber’s mother and/or Mrs. Culpepper from Saved By the Bell at the same time.

9). A sweat blocker/soaker for my overproducing head sweat glands.

10). The illusion of having a new wardrobe because everything now looks different on me.

11). An excuse to constantly look in the mirror to make sure I don’t look like Dorothy Hamill (although I know this won’t be able to last very much longer).

12). The confidence of a real life hair stylist. (I cut ‘dem things myself!)

13). Inspiration to try new things other than occasionally eating dairy.

14). The ability to trick myself into thinking that putting my hair in a pony tale is a “style.”

15). The self-motivation to brush my hair every day.

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Do some scary/fun thing today! Who knows what it’ll give you.

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